Miss Barbara has spent some time lately looking over my blog and other online activities. She has some ideas about direction and content that should soon become apparent. In the meantime however, she wants me to stress a few points where she feels like focus might have slipped a little.
First, Miss Barbara wants me to clarify that her sissy Jackie (me!) was not always a sissy. Unlike many that are sissies from birth, Jackie began her journey to sissyhood as a chronic masturbator that wore articles of women's clothing, meaning panties, for sexual excitement. Jackie is a sissy only because Miss Barbara decided that is what she should be and took steps to bring it about.
Admittedly, Miss Barbara's and my recall varies, so hers is correct. One thing is for sure, my identity as a man began to falter the day she confronted me with her discovery of my collection of panties. She had found them a few days earlier when we were packing for a hurricane evacuation. What I didn't know until later was that she had talked it over with her mother in the meantime. They decided that I was probably a secret crossdresser. It turned out that Miss Carolyn had some insight because, as she informed Miss Barb for the first time, her late husband, Miss Barb's father, was a crossdresser. They decided that they would start small and see what happened.
Soon after that I was wearing panties most of the time. My feeling was that I took to wearing panties so easily because I was a sissy at heart. Miss Barbara says no, it was because I got sexually excited by wearing panties which fueled my masturbation. Judging by the number of times she subsequently caught me jacking off in panties, she is no doubt correct.
Upon further discussions with her mother about my behavior, they decided I was probably not a crossdresser after all, just a chronic masturbator wearing panties for excitement. This insight also explained other shortcomings, mainly in the area of physical affection, that Miss Barbara had noted. Together they decided that my lack of control and neglect of husbandly duties was unacceptable and Miss Barbara should take control of the situation. If she failed, so would our marriage. It was during these talks that Miss Barbara and Miss Carolyn determined my future as a sissy.
Their plan had two aspects: One was to continue and increase the pace of feminization and see if I would go along with it, knowing that if I did so it would probably be for the sexual thrill. And two, if I did go along with the feminization, they would seek to break the association between dressing up and sexual excitement and masturbation.
Needless to say, I did go along with it, and it probably was in large part for the sexual thrill, although it is my feeling that I was already a sissy by that point. Soon I was sleeping in nighties, had no male undies at all, and Jackie the sissy maid had begun her duties. And then, using various techniques, some of which I describe in other blog entries, Miss Barbara did indeed weaken and break the link between dressing up and sexual activity. From that point on, I was not dressing for masturbatory reasons, I was truly and irreversibly a feminized sissy.
Well, that's it for now Happy Sissies, I hope you enjoyed the clarification of my sissy history. Thanks for reading and contact me and say "Hi" if you get a chance. See you next time and stay Happy, Sissies!
Has Miss Barbara and Miss Carolyn told you whether or not the option of placing you in a chastity device has been discussed? Under such an arrangement it would seem that the link between performing excellent service as her sissy maid and sexual activity could easily be established.
ReplyDeleteI so would love to find someone like you have to nurture and guide to becoming a better sissy and a cuck and a slave only to serve their needs.
ReplyDeleteMy story is different than yours but your blog is awesome. I guess I was in denial that i would never be a man and it took meeting my wife to show me the truth. Thanks for sharing, Jackie.
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